LAUREN IBAÑEZ / NEXTGENRADIO
What is the meaning of
home?
Alyson Rodriguez speaks with Gloria Staine on what home means to her. Gloria, 37, is a single mom and is working to establish a permanent home for herself and her children. She currently lives in Villa Maria, a women’s shelter in El Paso. The shelter helps women who are unhoused become self-sufficient. Since moving to Villa Maria, Gloria has found a job and will go back to school soon.
Single mom finds second chance at women’s shelter: “It’s a home in between homes”
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GLORIA STAINE:
To me home is somewhere where I can feel I can be myself, where I feel safe. It means being able to watch my children grow up, being able to tuck them in at night.
My name is Gloria Staine.
I’ve been here at Villa Maria a little over a year now. I do like to call it my temporary home. It’s a home in between homes. I feel safe here.
Villa Maria is a transitional shelter. It’s a safe place for women to come if they’re finding themselves close to homelessness.
We all have our own different and unique situation. We are all trying to find stability.
I actually like the sisterhood here. Some of us play bingo. Some of us enjoy puzzles, some of us enjoy growing plants. I think a lot of us enjoy cooking. We take turns cooking for each other.
I was born and raised in Los Angeles, California. I can’t say my family was a well-functioning family. We had our moments. There was a lot of fighting in the house, mostly between my sisters and I. My dad, he would take off for the weekend. He would come back angry at the world. My mother, she was always home. She cooked for us. She did her best with us.
I did end up in a foster home. My mother gave up my custody.
The last time I really felt like I was at home was when my daughter was three months old, I found myself going back to Los Angeles with my mother and we managed to find a little house in East Los Angeles.
I remember going to Sears, picking out a fridge and a stove with my mother, having them delivered, feeling safe and happy with my mother and my daughter. Being at peace and being happy as a family.
I actually have three children. My oldest she’ll be 16. I haven’t seen her since she was five. I lost custody of her sometime in 2012. My second daughter, she’s nine. And my son, he’s five.
My son is with his father in Conroe. My mother has my daughter in Los Angeles. Right now, I’m currently in the transitional stage here at Villa Maria. I am hoping to acquire funding for rapid rehousing. Hopefully if that all works, I’ll be able to have my children again.
Being at Villa Maria I’ve actually managed to work on myself. Learning how to pick and choose my battles. I feel like I’ve been able to better prepare myself for the future.
I’ve been able to save up to buy myself a vehicle. I’ve managed to buy things that I’m gonna need for my home. Pots, pans, knives. Sheets.
Despite everything I’ve been through, I’m just staying focused on the bigger picture. Having a home my children can feel safe, where even I can grow.
Yarn, books and multi-colored beads cover Gloria Staine’s bedside table. From it, she pulls out a beaded bracelet that she started for her youngest daughter. But she isn’t sure how to finish it to make sure it actually fits her. Staine isn’t living with her three children right now — ages 16, 9 and 5 — as she tries to rebuild her life.
“I want to have my family again,” Staine said. “To tuck in my children, make sure that they are healthy, make their meals. I want to be able to take them to school, watch them grow.”
Staine is 37 years old and was born in Los Angeles, California. She currently lives at Villa Maria, a women’s shelter in El Paso, Texas.
“To me, home is somewhere where I can feel I can be myself,” Staine said. “Where I can be alone with my thoughts … Somewhere I feel safe.”
The garden area is one of Gloria Staine’s favorite spots at Villa Maria. Sept. 4, 2023.
ALYSON RODRIGUEZ / NEXTGENRADIO
Growing up, Staine didn’t feel comfortable or safe at her own home.
“There was a lot of fighting in the house, mostly between my sisters and I,” she said. “My dad, he would take off for the weekend. He would come back angry at the world. My mother, she was always home. She cooked for us. She did her best with us.”
When Staine was 15, her dad had already left the household and her mother gave up her parental rights and placed her in foster care, where she spent 10 months in.
Later, at 24 years old, Staine found herself struggling as a single mom.
“I honestly found myself digging myself into a hole,” she said. “I thought about how was I gonna pay for childcare? How was I gonna get to and from school? How was I gonna get my child to and from childcare? What time was I gonna have for myself? I still had to pay rent, work, school, home, children – I kept on digging myself deeper into that hole.”
A stained glass window decorates the prayer room. Sept. 4, 2023.
ALYSON RODRIGUEZ / NEXTGENRADIO
A Virgin Mary in the center of Villa Maria is the garden area. Sept. 4, 2023.
ALYSON RODRIGUEZ / NEXTGENRADIO
For the last 14 months, Staine has been living at Villa Maria, a shelter for single women coming from different circumstances and helps them become self-sufficient. According to the center’s website, Villa Maria has served over 2,000 women since it opened in 2007.
“It’s a home in between homes. I feel safe here,” Staine said. “I’ve actually managed to be able to work on myself, know what works for me and what doesn’t. Learning how to pick and choose my battles.”
Women can stay at Villa Maria between three months to two years. They get their own room and bathroom and share common areas with each other, including a library, praying room, TV room, garden area and kitchen.
Even though Staine didn’t feel close to her own two sisters growing up, she’s found sisterhood with the other women at Villa Maria.
“I would call them sisters,” Staine said. “We all have our own different and unique situation. We are all trying to find stability.”
One of her favorite things to do there is cook with the other women.
“Some of us play bingo,” Staine said. “Some of us enjoy puzzles, some of us enjoy growing plants, tending to them. But to be honest, I think a lot of us enjoy cooking. We take turns cooking for each other.”
“It’s a home in between homes. I feel safe here. I’ve actually managed to be able to work on myself, know what works for me and what doesn’t. Learning how to pick and choose my battles.”
Artwork by Gloria Staine’s youngest daughter hangs on the window of her room at Villa Maria Women’s shelter in El Paso, Texas. She keeps it there as motivation and to remind her that she’s turning her life around for her kids. Sept. 4, 2023
ALYSON RODRIGUEZ / NEXTGENRADIO
While she dropped out of high school, Staine got her GED at the age of 30, and has plans to continue her education this fall.
At Villa Maria, Staine has been working on turning her life around. She currently works as a shift manager at a local Jack in the Box. Through this job, she’s been able to save up enough money to buy herself a car. Now she’s saving up to one day to buy a home for her and her three kids. Her son is living with his father in Texas, and her youngest daughter is in Los Angeles with her mom. Staine lost custody of her oldest daughter in 2012.
“I want my children to feel safe, to feel loved, that they can explore their own minds at home. I want them each to have their own little space,” she said.
Staine also hopes to mend her relationship with her own mom.
“My mom’s always been there for me. I’m always gonna be grateful to her for helping me with my children, for helping me to hold onto them.”